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briskly, iron out the dent in your heart as quickly as possible, and just get on
with the rest of your life.
The initial success of this admirable programme suffered a hiccup next day.
Victoria had no school as it was Saturday, but got up early just the same after
a very restless night to find the morning uniformly dark and grey, a perfect
match for her mood. The house confined her like a cage and she pulled on an
ancient duffel over her jersey and jeans and let herself out quietly, her feet
taking her down the foggy garden to the summerhouse from force of habit.
Inside it was dank and chilly and she shivered, subsiding on the rickety chair
to stare miserably through the grimy window, her chin propped in her hands.
She sat very still for a long time until, at last, the tears began to fall one by
one until the dam burst and she put her head down on her arms on the dusty
table and sobbed bitterly, the thought of never seeing Gavin again a sharp
bright pain in her heart. Huddled and wretched, she remained where she was
long after the sobs died away, her hot face hidden in the shelter of her arms
until a nudge under her elbow brought her upright in surprise to see Nero
sitting looking at her, his head cocked on one side.
'Nero!' Victoria slid to her knees and flung her arms round the dog, her face
buried against his shining coat. 'I thought you'd gone,' she said thickly as
Nero tried to lick her flushed face, then she stiffened as a tactful cough came
from the doorway. Slowly Victoria got to her feet, rubbing her eyes with the
back of one hand as she looked with hostility into Gavin's compassionate
eyes.
'I thought you'd gone too,' she said without grace.
'We stayed overnight with Mr Beaumont.' Gavin frowned anxiously at her
tear-streaked face and swollen eyelids. 'Why the tears, Victoria? Am I to
blame?'
Victoria tossed back her untidy hair and thrust her hands into her pockets.
'Good heavens, no,' she said airily. 'A fit of the blues, that's all. Studying gets
one down after a while.'
Gavin stepped up into the summerhouse, looming over Victoria in the
enclosed space. He put a finger under her chin and jerked her face up to his.
'Is that the only reason?' he asked, his eyes intent.
'Of course.' She stared him out stubbornly. 'You're up and about early.'
'Just taking Nero for a run before the car journey. He led me here with
determination must have smelt you.' He smiled, the tenderness in his eyes
breaking her in bits. 'You look very much the same as that first day, actually,
dirty face included only you're paler now.'
Victoria went paler still. 'Then your first and last impressions will match
exactly.'
Gavin sat on the edge of the table, his long legs stretched out in front of him.
'Why does it have to be the last, Victoria? Surely we'll see each other again
now and then?'
'It hardly seems likely.' Victoria looked away. 'Your Miss Lockhart will
take up all your spare time, I imagine. You won't have much opportunity for
keeping up with acquaintances.'
There was a curious expression in his eyes, a mixture of anger and hurt. 'I
thought we were friends, Victoria, not mere acquaintances.'
'Really?' she said coolly, and steadfastly kept her gaze trained on his chest,
not wanting him to see through her flimsy composure.
Gavin sprang to his feet and took her by the shoulders. 'I think of you and
your mother as very good friends can't you think of me in the same light?'
At his touch Victoria's composure disintegrated. 'No, I can't,' she burst out,
her vehemence startling herself as much as the man staring down at her. 'I
resent you. I wish you'd never come here and turned my life upside down.
Since you appeared on the scene I haven't even been able to work
properly pathetic, isn't it? Teenager in throes of first crush so frightfully
amusing to everyone but the silly idiot who's suffering!'
'Stop it, Victoria, don't--' Gavin tried to hold her close, but she struggled
violently and he let her go.
'Don't worry,' she said wearily. 'I won't be an embarrassment to you. You'd
never have known if you hadn't come here this morning and found me
wallowing in self-pity.'
Gavin swore under his breath and took hold of her, shaking her hard. Then
he pulled her against him, her face hidden in his sweater where she could
feel his warmth and hear the steady thud of his heart against her cheek.
'Listen to me, Victoria,' he said huskily. 'No don't pull away. If it makes
you feel any better I'll admit you possess a certain quality that tempts me
strongly it has from the very beginning, even when I thought you were a
child.'
Victoria's head went back in scornful disbelief, her eyes widening as they
met the blaze of sincerity in his.
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